Feeling of Rs. 250

“250 Rupees for one night, is it fine with you?” bargained Rossa with a dark beast looking man, while putting a pinch of tobacco mingled with liquefied limestone underneath her lower lip. It smelt like a rotten peace of dead leaf.

“Ok, whatever you say. Now don’t waste my time,” replied dark man, while trying to fetch her close by grabbing her dark but slender arm. Rossa jerked his hand away and entered into room after him by keeping at least a forearm distance.

The bed was tatty and an odd odor rose from it. To really get a feel of it one should carry a special privilege to enter into the room. Bed clothing was crinkled and seemed, as though it had never been made. A small bulb lightened the small room and illumination rendered by it was such dim that the tiny stuff inside the room would almost go inconspicuous. A pillow was placed at the middle of the bed and another one on the cold floor. Rossa picked it the other one and threw it so carelessly on the bed as if doesn’t matter since in couple of minutes it would be again find at the floor. Dark man touched nothing inside the room, not even the door which he had left open after entering room and unquestionably, Rossa went back to close it.

Meanwhile, dark man began removing his shirt & trousers and signaled Rossa without even looking at her to take out her clothes as well. Rossa looked at him very carefully with grieved eyes and then took off her clothes. She stood as though a lifeless monument and waited for further instructions to be instructed. It felt that dark man had bought her for that night and she would serve her master’s every wish.

“Come over,” instructed the dark man. Rossa waited for a moment, perhaps polished her soul off with that instruction, and then followed master’s syllable like a doubtless slave and sat next to him with moist-less eyes. He squeezed her shoulders and bosoms, wildly kissed her face, and eventually snatched away the last traces of her clothes. She moaned a little which arose owing to precipitous hurt she felt due to the sudden abduction made by dark man. 

  After few moments of groaning with folded eyes Rossa tried to pull her away but that dark man pushed her on to bed with a thwack and came over. He threw pillow again on the floor from where it was picked up a couple of minutes ago. Rossa felt herself under loads of weight and fought for breathe like a fish away from water. She heard knuckling sound of her own weak bones under him and finally, with a shove she was only left with wide-open eyes, a deep moan and two steep lines of tears appeared from the corner of her deep painful eyes which streamed down into her black hairs and disappeared somewhere. Few moments later, she felt nothing, not even slight pain and turned into a dead body lying with folded eyes and waited to be identified by someone.

Night was intact when she opened her eyes and looked towards the closed door. She stood up, looked around, and found embraced currency notes lying on last traces of her clothes at the floor and dark man was nowhere. She felt very much pain and weakness though she collected all her strewed clothes; put them on even though for her they were nowhere. In her conception, she felt more naked than any time before, once again. Adjusted her dusted hairs and picked up Rs. 250 from the ground and shoved them inside her old ragged purse she walked out from the room. She looked around, all the contiguous rooms were locked seems everyone had left the place before the dawn could place a knock at the doors of their dark life. She placed her stole around the neck and headed as though trying to be invisible in the world of shameless eyes.

Rossa walked briskly until the main road and stopped a rickshaw by calling, “Rickshaw?” as if she wanted not to be heard by the god who was everywhere for everyone but nowhere for her. Rickshaw took her to a building, which seems as it stood at some hope, not at the base just like Rossa. Outer walls had forgotten its own color and even it was difficult for Rossa to name leftover shade, at some places even the years old plaster had worn to shreds and the reddish-yellow bricks could be seen as if speckles on tattered clothes of Rossa. She quickly glanced at the open windows of building only to witness the prevailed gloom in them. She took a sigh as if attempted to relax herself from pain and fear but of no use, she still had the same torment in her and evidently, she went inside.

She opened the door of her room very carefully and closed in the same manner so that no one could sense her arrival not even in the dreams. She directly went to her bed, lay down with crouched legs, and put a bed sheet to cover herself completely. With both hands she held her stomach as if the pain that she bore in her soul evoked to her stomach.

A knock appeared at her door and it brought her back from the sleep. She opened eyes as if just relinquished from a horrible nightmare. She looked around for a while by sitting on her bed and then slowly walked down to the door and opened it just to find a boy of almost 10 years in age stood outside wearing an underwear and shabby shirt.

He said, “Papa has asked for the rent. You gave words for today.”

Rossa left him there at the door and went back. She looked around and twisted towards the place where the holy god was sitting in a glass frame. She snaffled the frame and from its back withdrew the money, which she had left for her god to guard on her behalf in her absence. She counted all the currency notes, then went to her bed and took out the squeezed Rs. 250 from her purse. After putting the money together she again enumerated with swollen eyes. Finally, when the count matched with the required count she went back to door and handed over it to the child who waited for her to come up with the rent.

She closed the door, prepared a half cup of tea for herself, sat down next to the window, and looked outside into the street. She thought about the last night and tears oozed out into her dying eyes just like most mornings and she thanked the dark man who had spent a portion of his night with her and awarded her with Rs. 250 for her flesh. She again looked down into the street and found Mohan standing at the other side of muddy road looking at her. Mohan Kept looking at her with still eyes and after couple of more moments he walked away as if a stranger, with no gesture, with no smiles, with nothing, like other every morning.

By Rajveer Singh

Image : Courtesy to Google search.